When it comes to happy thoughts and dreams, our exes might not be the first people who come to mind. In fact, most of us would instead prefer to forget about our exes once the relationship has run its course.
As a result, it can be unsettling if our exes start popping up in our dreams. We might not know the meanings behind the dreams, so we might assume that they are negative. Understanding these dreams is worthwhile because they are valuable messages straight from your subconscious mind.
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what does it mean when you dream about your ex?
Regardless of whether it was a mutual decision or an awkward breakup, we don’t usually expect to dream about our exes. So naturally, when your ex starts to appear in your dreams, you might be curious.
Interestingly, the dreams convey the same message regardless of your gender or the gender of your ex. So here are a few possible meanings when you dream about an ex:
1. You haven’t dealt with your feelings
Most people don’t want to admit that their feelings have not been resolved for their ex. However, often dreaming of your ex would imply that you have some unresolved feelings. Keep in mind that these feelings aren’t necessarily romantic.
It can be that many things were left unsaid, or you felt that the breakup wasn’t fair. On the other hand, it could be that you miss the companionship that the person provided. Since the dreams often imply unresolved emotions, it isn’t unusual to dream about your ex if the relationship ends unexpectedly.
What can you do to make the dreams stop? Well, your subconscious mind is trying to tell you that there are unresolved feelings, so the best way to deal with the dreams is to attempt to resolve the issues. This can be done by getting some form of closure. But, of course, not all breakups are the same, so even though it would be perfectly fine for some people to meet up with their exes a final time, others might dread it.
If you are seeking closure, you can try these methods:
- Communicate with your ex about what happened
This can shed some light on possible misunderstandings that happened and can give you peace and closure.
- Talk to someone you trust about how you feel
If you are not comfortable talking to your ex, you can chat to a loyal friend about how things ended. More often than not, talking about your feelings can offer closure.
- Write a letter to your ex
Putting your thoughts on paper is an effective way to deal with your feelings. As a result, this can be an excellent method to get closure without even giving the letter to your ex.
- Seek the help of a therapist
If you feel that your emotions remain unresolved, meeting with a therapist can make a significant difference. A therapist provides a safe space where you can freely talk about your feelings without the fear of judgment.
2. You’re weighing up a new relationship
Although we might not want to admit it, it is human nature to compare. You might feel very confused if you have recently started a new relationship and started dreaming about your ex. However, these dreams don’t mean that you still have feelings for your ex.
In fact, they are your subconscious mind’s way of weighing up the new relationship to see if it is worth your time and effort. So, although these dreams might make you uncomfortable, they will pass as your relationship progresses.
3. You hope to change your ways
Our relationships teach us a lot about ourselves. For example, if you frequently dream about your ex, it could be that you saw a side of yourself in the relationship that you didn’t like. If you have continued with these negative ways, your subconscious might be trying to tell you that you should work on yourself.
Selfcare and self-improvement are always important. Therefore, reflect on what happened and how you acted. If you know that you behaved negatively, you can try to make amends with your ex to soothe your subconscious mind.
Take these dreams as encouragement from your subconscious mind to reflect on your relationship and think about things within you that might require some work. Remember to be patient with yourself because it takes time to change bad habits and traits.
4. You are scared to be hurt again
If your relationship ended badly or unexpectedly, it is understandable that you might be nervous about getting into a new relationship. You might be reluctant because there is a risk of getting hurt again. Therefore, dreaming about an ex when you are about to start a new relationship could be your subconscious mind warning you to be careful.
Of course, these dreams don’t mean that you shouldn’t start a new relationship. Instead, they are kind reminders that you have experienced some pain in the past and that you should make good decisions about your future relationships. Once you start with a happy and healthy relationship or decide not to pursue a relationship, after all, these dreams will stop.
5. You hope to forgive your ex
It is only natural to be reluctant to forgive if you have been badly hurt. However, forgiving your ex gives you peace of mind and closure. This is what you truly need to leave the failed relationship in the past and begin afresh. Therefore, even if you are still in pain or angry, you should consider forgiveness.
Being unable to forgive those who hurt us can be detrimental to our health and overall happiness. We only weaken our own emotional state by holding onto anger, resentment, or thoughts of revenge. Therefore, if your ex keeps appearing in your dreams, you shouldn’t ignore it. It can be that your subconscious mind is trying to tell you that the time has come to forgive your ex and truly move on. This way you can become a happier person.
6. You are lonely
Sadly, a big part of dealing with a breakup is handling the loneliness that comes with it. It can be especially hard if you have been dating for many years or living together. When you are in a relationship, you get used to having a companion. Unfortunately, when the relationship ends, the companionship usually ends, too.
Therefore, if you keep dreaming about your ex, the dreams don’t mean that you still have feelings for your ex. Instead, you are just feeling alone. It is a good idea to reach out to others if these dreams continue because you are suffering emotionally.
If you feel that you have become very lonely since your breakup, consider widening your groups of friends. Often people are tempted to start a new relationship right away in an effort to replace the lost companion, but it isn’t ideal since there might still be unresolved feelings.
If you are missing companionship, reach out to your loved ones and let them know that you need their support. Breakups can be problematic because they don’t only lead to disappointment over a romantic relationship that has ended, but they also lead to you finding yourself without a partner.
It is important to take good care of yourself during this time. Get enough sleep, exercise regularly, and follow a healthy diet. These things also help boost your happiness and might make you feel more positive as a result.
7. Something in your life is causing you unhappiness
Often dreaming about an ex would imply that something in your life is causing you sadness. For example, the breakup that you have gone through with your ex symbolizes the desire to break up with something negative in your life.
The root of your unhappiness is something that you should deal with as soon as possible because it is causing you emotional distress. If you know what is causing you to be unhappy, it will be easier to think about ways to resolve the issue.
However, what do you do if you don’t know the root of your unhappiness? Then you should be asking yourself these questions:
- Is someone in my life dragging me down or influencing me negatively?
- Do any of my habits make me feel depressed or unsuccessful?
- Am I happy in my personal, professional, and family life? If the answer is negative to any of these, focus on these areas to try to relieve your sadness.
We all hope to live happy lives. However, by understanding the message that this dream delivers, you will be able to focus on the areas in your life that are bringing you down. If you start to make changes in your life, the dreams should stop.
Having your ex appear in a dream can be surprising and even disturbing. However, these dreams can be precious. By taking the time to assess your ex-related dreams, you might find powerful messages from your subconscious mind.
As a result, these dreams can lead you to a happier life and even better relationships in the future.
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